How many times have you slammed that Cosco ball on the wall? What if it decides to do the same to you?
Poetic right? :)
Leave your thoughts below!
Christopher Jonathan James Nolan. A Man whose movies are Chaos Theory personified. Incidentally me being his greatest fan, realized there is some sense in the chaotic mind of mine. This blog will see myself sharing my random thought stream. Like i said CHAOS. It all makes sense in the end. Now i'am not making sense at all.
Showing posts with label Humor. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Humor. Show all posts
April 25, 2013
February 26, 2012
When Shit Happens
 |
| Minding their business |
THE CROW (caaw caaw, no not that horror movie)
Why so much angst you ask? Well, i'l have to rewind the clocks by 2 years to narrate this gooey story. (Alert! Do not read further if you do not like gross stuff and if your the Lord Labaku Das type!)
<<GOING BACK IN TIME>>
<<<March 2012..Zkkk Zkkk Zkkk.. -> November 2011..Zkkk Zkkk..-> January 2011..Zkkk Zkkk.. March 2010>>>
3 months into my first job, i was happy with the way things were turning out..And of course, being a lover of long distance biking, the journey from my home to my workplace was initially blissful. Why? Because i have a machine that loves me back as much as i love 'her'. The Yam R15. The bike and i are one you know.
Anyway, so as always i park my bike outside the office (duh) and go to work (duh). This was the routine for the last 3 months. And then it happened..straight out of a Night Shyamalan Movie. There is a huge bla-bla tree outside the office that spans across half the street with its terrifying bark and branches..it sways and creaks to the winds and gives a terrifying effect when it gets dark in the evening..BUT. Among those branches and leaves, i could feel a 100 eyes watching me, the electric tension making the strands of hair on my head stand up. And there it was. Or should i say, there they were. Perched on the branches in perfect battle formation, they blessed me with a holy darshan of their bottoms..Shock. Realisation. The enormity of it all !
They were getting ready to drop the BIG GUNS! The adrenaline rush was incredible, time slowed down, just as how the environment is blurred while aiming down a target, all i could see were the sinister beaks and ready-to-drop behinds of these crows. The scrawny one 20 feet above me drew first blood, and that was the moment that changed my entire life..!
In Slow-Mo, i saw the white/yellow/brown gooey substance making its way down - to me. Reflexes numbed, and with zero reaction time, SPLAT!!!! and LO, i was anointed in holy kaka pee (crow shit in Tamil). I swear i heard that sonofagun say "You want a piece of me punk?!"
Shaken by the attack, i prayed that the madness would stop. But no..the Others. They wanted to relieve some of the pent-up frustration too. And suddenly, 6 crows made a coordinated strike by trying to box me in a turtle formation and another 3 swooped down like B2 Bombers..! After all the chaos and after the poop splattering spree, i was shocked to see that my bike was completely bathed in fresh golden poop! and i was left with minimal damage to my shoulders and feet! AAARGHH!
The Black Beast (the bike) was now a dalmation dog!
Everyday, like clockwork the battalion of crows would do "Poop Visarjan/Pee Abhishegam" on my bike and i'l have to get down and dirty and clean the mess up! EVERY SINGLE DAY.
So what is the deal with these crows huh? Why is that they get such sadistic pleasures in defacing innocent humans, inanimate vehicles or those poor freedom fighters (the statues ofc)? And why is that these creatures sit on high altitude places and poop? Is it because they want to make an 'impact' ?! Would it hurt if they just sat on some wall or something and attended to their business?? Ah...alas i do not know the answers to these questions.
But i do know the reason why crows poop so much. That's because they eat like pigs! So this is what i presume is there on their daily menu:
6.00 AM : Wake Up. Crow for some time.
7.00 AM : Meet up with some of my homies. Group crowing sessions begin. (Need the exercise)
8.00 AM : Fly to the nearest temple. Grab a bite of the holy offerings.
9.30 AM : Fly to Brahmin Household with homies. Eat into the carb rich ghee + pappu mammam (rice) left for us. (We crows are your ancestors you see)
10.45 AM : Fly to the nearest butcher shop. Dig into those delicious leftovers. Caaw Caaw (Yum Yum)
1.30 PM : Ah! is that a dead rat i see? Scavenging Time! Caaw Caaw (Double Yum)
3.30 PM : Fly to Corporation Dumpyard with more buddies. Ah this is the mother lode! Eat eat eat!
5.30 PM : Hmm, stomach rumbling, must loosen up bowels. Must find comfortable tree.
6.00 PM : <<Perched atop THE tree>>
6.15 PM : All homies get excited! Caaw Caaw Caaw (Look look! Jayanth's shiny bike! Lets have some fun boys!) Instructions from Group Leader <<SIT UPRIGHT>> <<POSITION BUM DIRECTLY PERPENDICULAR TO BIKE>> <<WHEN YOUR READY>> <<LET 'EM HAVE IT>> SWooooooosshh!! SPLAT SPLAT SPLAT SPLAT!!
6.30 PM : Ahhh..whate relief. Lets scram boys.
6.45 PM : Jayanth leaves from work. Looks outside. Bile outburst. End of Story.
Yep, this is exactly what must be happening on a daily basis. Bottomline: Crows love to poop on unsuspecting people and objects.
And me? I have been diagnosed with severe Aerial Avian Coprophobia !
<<In the background, a dropping sound is heard..too late.SPLAT!>>
Damn you crow!!
P.S - Once again, a super duper ultra thanks to Sandhya Prabhat for the extremely awesome cartoon! This post is definitely incomplete without the pictorial support from her. (She will soon teach the existing gurus a thing or two in the future)
If you liked this post, just share or e-mail it to your friends!
To read my other post with Sandhya's cartoon, see A Place to Be Naked.
About Sandhya:
Sandhya Prabhat is from Chennai, India. She is a freelance illustrator and animator, and has finished her MFA in Animation and Digital Arts in NYU Tisch Asia School of the Arts, Singapore. She has a Bachelor's degree in English Literature from Stella Maris College, Chennai. She also enjoys reading, writing and appreciates good vegetarian food. She is currently utilising 100% of her brain for multiple projects for several clients.
No, she does not have a blog yet but hopes to have one soon.
She can be reached at sandhya.22@gmail.com
The Black Beast (the bike) was now a dalmation dog!
Everyday, like clockwork the battalion of crows would do "Poop Visarjan/Pee Abhishegam" on my bike and i'l have to get down and dirty and clean the mess up! EVERY SINGLE DAY.
So what is the deal with these crows huh? Why is that they get such sadistic pleasures in defacing innocent humans, inanimate vehicles or those poor freedom fighters (the statues ofc)? And why is that these creatures sit on high altitude places and poop? Is it because they want to make an 'impact' ?! Would it hurt if they just sat on some wall or something and attended to their business?? Ah...alas i do not know the answers to these questions.
But i do know the reason why crows poop so much. That's because they eat like pigs! So this is what i presume is there on their daily menu:
6.00 AM : Wake Up. Crow for some time.
7.00 AM : Meet up with some of my homies. Group crowing sessions begin. (Need the exercise)
8.00 AM : Fly to the nearest temple. Grab a bite of the holy offerings.
9.30 AM : Fly to Brahmin Household with homies. Eat into the carb rich ghee + pappu mammam (rice) left for us. (We crows are your ancestors you see)
10.45 AM : Fly to the nearest butcher shop. Dig into those delicious leftovers. Caaw Caaw (Yum Yum)
1.30 PM : Ah! is that a dead rat i see? Scavenging Time! Caaw Caaw (Double Yum)
3.30 PM : Fly to Corporation Dumpyard with more buddies. Ah this is the mother lode! Eat eat eat!
5.30 PM : Hmm, stomach rumbling, must loosen up bowels. Must find comfortable tree.
6.00 PM : <<Perched atop THE tree>>
6.15 PM : All homies get excited! Caaw Caaw Caaw (Look look! Jayanth's shiny bike! Lets have some fun boys!) Instructions from Group Leader <<SIT UPRIGHT>> <<POSITION BUM DIRECTLY PERPENDICULAR TO BIKE>> <<WHEN YOUR READY>> <<LET 'EM HAVE IT>> SWooooooosshh!! SPLAT SPLAT SPLAT SPLAT!!
6.30 PM : Ahhh..whate relief. Lets scram boys.
6.45 PM : Jayanth leaves from work. Looks outside. Bile outburst. End of Story.
Yep, this is exactly what must be happening on a daily basis. Bottomline: Crows love to poop on unsuspecting people and objects.
And me? I have been diagnosed with severe Aerial Avian Coprophobia !
<<In the background, a dropping sound is heard..too late.SPLAT!>>
Damn you crow!!
P.S - Once again, a super duper ultra thanks to Sandhya Prabhat for the extremely awesome cartoon! This post is definitely incomplete without the pictorial support from her. (She will soon teach the existing gurus a thing or two in the future)
If you liked this post, just share or e-mail it to your friends!
To read my other post with Sandhya's cartoon, see A Place to Be Naked.
About Sandhya:
Sandhya Prabhat is from Chennai, India. She is a freelance illustrator and animator, and has finished her MFA in Animation and Digital Arts in NYU Tisch Asia School of the Arts, Singapore. She has a Bachelor's degree in English Literature from Stella Maris College, Chennai. She also enjoys reading, writing and appreciates good vegetarian food. She is currently utilising 100% of her brain for multiple projects for several clients. She can be reached at sandhya.22@gmail.com
September 18, 2011
The Brain Button !
Hellooo...its an awesome Sunday evening, nothing to do but just sit back and reeelax..! Before you start wondering about what i have to say this time...am sorry to disappoint you that it won't be me doing the rambling today! Nope. Uh uh.
At the same time, am very happy to introduce to you all a very very close friend, who believes this:
At the same time, am very happy to introduce to you all a very very close friend, who believes this:
"My idea of fun,
Is good conversation.
My drug of choice, my poison,
Is good conversation.
My mental peace, my salvation,
Is good conversation.
Love, I’m certain,
Is good conversation."
Is good conversation.
My drug of choice, my poison,
Is good conversation.
My mental peace, my salvation,
Is good conversation.
Love, I’m certain,
Is good conversation."
And the person who said it...is Meghna Kannan! At first glance, she comes across as a person full of energy and crazyness! An awesome artist, she lets her hands and words do the talking! And so the day before she left to France (last week), i said "Megz why don't you write on my blog?! and she was like "ummmmm..." After numerous attempts to convince her to write, she finally said "Ok Ju, i'm not really sure about this, il think about it!"
But am happy that she came around, and this is what she has to say....
..........................................................................................................
.....Sitting at Frankfurt airport is as good time as any to start working on my “guest” post on friend’s blog. I honestly have no intention of bragging about the fancy-ass airport, but this is the first thing I thought of doing to kill the 2 hrs time I’ve got till I catch my bus from here to my destination.
An Indian at an airport is always a peculiar sight to people here. I’m not generalizing our infamous habits of being the only one with 3 HUGE bags or our legendary white sneakers-blue jean style statement, not at all. We can be cool too. But I do generalize our quality of winning raised eyebrows, 2nd looks and occasionally a jaw-dropped gawk.
So I perched myself on this sort of maroon marble blocks, randomly placed to form a seating area, which I swear is no different from our kitchen thinnai material, surrounded by coffee shops, a mobile charging port, money exchange counter, information desk, ATM, escalators starting and ending erratically from all directions and directly across the exit gate from where I catch my bus. I started off by being just some regular colourful-attired person sitting there until my Indian-ness started crawling into me. There’s only so much I can sit with my legs dangling before which my legs automatically fold into a chaplaankuti.
And then of course this is followed by the very scrupulous procedure of finding that comfort zone. Mine involved a mini bag fort and changing my slightly greasy pinnal into a kondai. As I carefully remove my DELL, like it’s worth its weight in gold from my very cool broken-zipped, strapless HCL bag, I well up looking at the water stains on the top, clearly a fruitless attempt of Amma’s to keep my laptop dust-free and open it to find 3 of Tulsi’s (my dog) hair on my keys, just a few zillion finger prints and a neat layer dust on the keys. Trust me, I needed to literally lift my computer to chin-level and blow, like one would do with an old book! When I looked up I found three people gaping at me like I was some sort of performing monkey. I pretended not to notice and dug my head into my laptop.
The transition slowly begins. From loose, airy salwars to snuggle-fit jeans, chappals to sneakers, from Vodafone prepaid sim to the French sim, (10 paise/min to 1€/min), from blaring noise to absolute deafening silence to the point where I can hear my anklets ‘jill-jill-jill’ echo while I walk the streets at 10 am! Before I continue, for the record, I do love Europe and I actually am slowly getting pumped to get started with the new year (also ‘cos the sooner it begins, the sooner it ends ;)) Only that my love for this place is sometimes, ok yes, more often than rare, clouded by my love for home. I’m not calling it homesickness, nope not this time. It’s just going to take a few days* to tune my brain to Europe. I wonder whether there’s a neuroscience theory to it. When love can be explained as a simple chemical reaction, desiness to non-desiness might just be switch-on/switch-off mechanism. All it takes is will power as I’m told!
I was just passed by a Tulsi replica and I was ignored!!! (Oh the heartbreak of not being slobbered over, getting muddy paw-prints and hair all over my clothes) Ok so this switch on/off thing maybe more complex than I thought!
Short circuit those hard-wired habits! *SWITCH!* ♪Wayyy ay ay way ay ay! Turn it over now, turn around now! ♪ ♫
For the uninitiated,
But am happy that she came around, and this is what she has to say....
..........................................................................................................
.....Sitting at Frankfurt airport is as good time as any to start working on my “guest” post on friend’s blog. I honestly have no intention of bragging about the fancy-ass airport, but this is the first thing I thought of doing to kill the 2 hrs time I’ve got till I catch my bus from here to my destination.
An Indian at an airport is always a peculiar sight to people here. I’m not generalizing our infamous habits of being the only one with 3 HUGE bags or our legendary white sneakers-blue jean style statement, not at all. We can be cool too. But I do generalize our quality of winning raised eyebrows, 2nd looks and occasionally a jaw-dropped gawk.
So I perched myself on this sort of maroon marble blocks, randomly placed to form a seating area, which I swear is no different from our kitchen thinnai material, surrounded by coffee shops, a mobile charging port, money exchange counter, information desk, ATM, escalators starting and ending erratically from all directions and directly across the exit gate from where I catch my bus. I started off by being just some regular colourful-attired person sitting there until my Indian-ness started crawling into me. There’s only so much I can sit with my legs dangling before which my legs automatically fold into a chaplaankuti.
And then of course this is followed by the very scrupulous procedure of finding that comfort zone. Mine involved a mini bag fort and changing my slightly greasy pinnal into a kondai. As I carefully remove my DELL, like it’s worth its weight in gold from my very cool broken-zipped, strapless HCL bag, I well up looking at the water stains on the top, clearly a fruitless attempt of Amma’s to keep my laptop dust-free and open it to find 3 of Tulsi’s (my dog) hair on my keys, just a few zillion finger prints and a neat layer dust on the keys. Trust me, I needed to literally lift my computer to chin-level and blow, like one would do with an old book! When I looked up I found three people gaping at me like I was some sort of performing monkey. I pretended not to notice and dug my head into my laptop.
The transition slowly begins. From loose, airy salwars to snuggle-fit jeans, chappals to sneakers, from Vodafone prepaid sim to the French sim, (10 paise/min to 1€/min), from blaring noise to absolute deafening silence to the point where I can hear my anklets ‘jill-jill-jill’ echo while I walk the streets at 10 am! Before I continue, for the record, I do love Europe and I actually am slowly getting pumped to get started with the new year (also ‘cos the sooner it begins, the sooner it ends ;)) Only that my love for this place is sometimes, ok yes, more often than rare, clouded by my love for home. I’m not calling it homesickness, nope not this time. It’s just going to take a few days* to tune my brain to Europe. I wonder whether there’s a neuroscience theory to it. When love can be explained as a simple chemical reaction, desiness to non-desiness might just be switch-on/switch-off mechanism. All it takes is will power as I’m told!
* subjected to change without notice
I was just passed by a Tulsi replica and I was ignored!!! (Oh the heartbreak of not being slobbered over, getting muddy paw-prints and hair all over my clothes) Ok so this switch on/off thing maybe more complex than I thought!
*DEEEPPPPPPP BREATH*
So, welcome to the first of its kind, a Guest blog! Before you begin judging, give me a chance to defend this silly idea. For a person like me, who’s always thought of blogging but never broke out of that “personal writing” shell, I think this is a perfect start. And for people like Jayanth Kashyap, who could use the publicity of an awesome blog entry, its pretty prefect too! C’est parfait! :P It’s a wonder that I haven’t been kicked out of France for raping their language!
Well, apart from the language murder, I recently realised I have done total injustice to this beautiful place I’ve stayed in for a year already. Last year’s lonely, gloomy gullies are today’s gorgeous cobblestone pathways decked with lush green canopies dancing to the gentle chilly breeze, with the sun playing hide and seek with the whipped-cream like clouds in the baby blue skies. It’s no wonder whichever tiny gully in some remote Indian village our bollywood/kollywood heroes hail from, and however localll they may be, they dance with their heroines only in European gullies. I honestly felt like bursting out into a song and was hoping for a hero to appear suddenly from behind a tree and twirl me around, with our costumes constantly changing as we danced.
Evidently, last year’s nostalgia-inducing songs on my playlist, where every song had its own history, are today’s regular sing-along songs. Last year’s committed, undeterred relationship with my computer (or rather skype) is today’s relationship with this place. Last year’s grumble-filled, whiny, polambifying foreign oor-kadhais are today’s overseas adventures and alien-land escapades. Last year’s loneliness is today’s individualism. Yes, it did take me a LONG time to find my “switch”.
For example – Me being highly loyal and unfalteringly biased to my mother’s mouth-watering food, the separation was initially unbearable. My first ever saambar was literally emosanal attyachar and I blamed France for it! *SWITCH* Meghna’s Special Sunday Saambar. All you need is patience and adaptable or better yet dead taste buds. :D
At the French grocery store - “3,90 € for a watermelon??! –brain gears start grinding... processing... 3,70 × 65 = Rs.253.50??!!!!- beep beep *curse* how will I gullet the fruit?” *SWITCH* At the roadside besant nagar chappal shop, “Uncle, woh chappal kitne ka hai?” “Beta, woh chappal, 320 rupees, with 20 rupees discount, final rate Rs.300” “300??? –brain gears start grinding... processing... Rs. 300 = 4 € “Bas? Teekh hai Uncle”
In this ever-changing world and the sheer unpredictability of life, circumstances and situations, the magnitude of the “switch” is fascinating. The comfort of familiarity is beautiful, no doubt. But the weird and wonderful adrenalin-rush and the challenge of new, however daunting and overwhelming can be quite enjoyable when “switch”ed to discover the comfort in the unfamiliar.
 |
| Switching Homes |
Evidently, last year’s nostalgia-inducing songs on my playlist, where every song had its own history, are today’s regular sing-along songs. Last year’s committed, undeterred relationship with my computer (or rather skype) is today’s relationship with this place. Last year’s grumble-filled, whiny, polambifying foreign oor-kadhais are today’s overseas adventures and alien-land escapades. Last year’s loneliness is today’s individualism. Yes, it did take me a LONG time to find my “switch”.
For example – Me being highly loyal and unfalteringly biased to my mother’s mouth-watering food, the separation was initially unbearable. My first ever saambar was literally emosanal attyachar and I blamed France for it! *SWITCH* Meghna’s Special Sunday Saambar. All you need is patience and adaptable or better yet dead taste buds. :D
At the French grocery store - “3,90 € for a watermelon??! –brain gears start grinding... processing... 3,70 × 65 = Rs.253.50??!!!!- beep beep *curse* how will I gullet the fruit?” *SWITCH* At the roadside besant nagar chappal shop, “Uncle, woh chappal kitne ka hai?” “Beta, woh chappal, 320 rupees, with 20 rupees discount, final rate Rs.300” “300??? –brain gears start grinding... processing... Rs. 300 = 4 € “Bas? Teekh hai Uncle”
In this ever-changing world and the sheer unpredictability of life, circumstances and situations, the magnitude of the “switch” is fascinating. The comfort of familiarity is beautiful, no doubt. But the weird and wonderful adrenalin-rush and the challenge of new, however daunting and overwhelming can be quite enjoyable when “switch”ed to discover the comfort in the unfamiliar.
Short circuit those hard-wired habits! *SWITCH!* ♪Wayyy ay ay way ay ay! Turn it over now, turn around now! ♪ ♫
For the uninitiated,
Glossary:
Thinnai – Table top
Chaplaankutti – Seated with folded legs
Pinnal – Braid/Plait
Kondai – The hair rolled into a bun
Salwars – The baggy Indian style pants
Chappal – Flip-flops
Polambifying – complaining
Oor kadhai – Story
Saambar – A south Indian delicacy (like a vegetable-lentil broth)
Emosanal attyachaar – emotional brutality
Chaplaankutti – Seated with folded legs
Pinnal – Braid/Plait
Kondai – The hair rolled into a bun
Salwars – The baggy Indian style pants
Chappal – Flip-flops
Polambifying – complaining
Oor kadhai – Story
Saambar – A south Indian delicacy (like a vegetable-lentil broth)
Emosanal attyachaar – emotional brutality
September 15, 2011
I am a Criminal !
[Jayanth's room..Dirty Harry playing in the background...]
Harry Callahan: "....this is a .44 Magnum, the most powerful handgun in the world, and would blow your head clean off, you've got to ask yourself one question: Do I feel lucky? Well, do ya, punk?..."
[Jayanth realises that your staring at his blog, quickly pauses the movie..]
Jayanth: "...click..click click! ...Mute."
.................................................
Hey there!! That was one of the greatest Clint Eastwood quotes of all time..! So do i feel lucky today? Absolutely not..and why? you will soon know!
Almost 21 months into my job...and i've developed a really bad habit..staying awake till my granma's ghost scares me to sleep and sleeping till my dreams become a reality..Vicious circle you see...Sleep late, wake up late and you end up doing everything late the whole day..take my work for example..today although i was prepped to leave early i still reached the work place at 11 AM.
It was one of those days where one wonders "which side of the bed did i awake from?!"
As all of you would be aware, namma Chennai traffic will scare the pyjamas off of even namma Superstar Rajnikanth! He can do anything in this world, except avoiding/weaving through our traffic. And it always so happens that i had to get caught in the busiest of days - Today.
Thankfully, my faithful beast - Yamaha R15 - never lets me down. I hang my bag on the two rearview mirrors so that it straddles my petrol tank (to avoid sweating you see), wear my helmet and the journey from my place (Saligramam) to my workplace (MRC Nagar) is a loong journey. I get to play road rash with my other late going office buddies, give evil stares to aunties standing in the middle of the road, try to act brave in front of the bus drivers, avert near certain death a couple of times and ofcourse, bask in the glorious Sunshine. Gives an awesome suntan you know. Try it out!
In the middle of all this, just 3 KM away from work, i get pulled over by namma traffic police. The usual scene - Sergeant with his humongous left thigh on his even bigger bike, seriously fiddling with something god knows what. The constables trying to catch every miserable sod on a two wheeler - ones not wearing helmets, overspeeding, riding with two pillion riders, and ofcourse the ones who obey traffic rules most of the time.
Maybe it was my bushy goatee or i dont know what exactly. The constable caught me reaching the signal and instantly jumped in the middle of the road and said -
Harry Callahan: "....this is a .44 Magnum, the most powerful handgun in the world, and would blow your head clean off, you've got to ask yourself one question: Do I feel lucky? Well, do ya, punk?..."
[Jayanth realises that your staring at his blog, quickly pauses the movie..]
Jayanth: "...click..click click! ...Mute."
.................................................
Hey there!! That was one of the greatest Clint Eastwood quotes of all time..! So do i feel lucky today? Absolutely not..and why? you will soon know!
Almost 21 months into my job...and i've developed a really bad habit..staying awake till my granma's ghost scares me to sleep and sleeping till my dreams become a reality..Vicious circle you see...Sleep late, wake up late and you end up doing everything late the whole day..take my work for example..today although i was prepped to leave early i still reached the work place at 11 AM.
It was one of those days where one wonders "which side of the bed did i awake from?!"
As all of you would be aware, namma Chennai traffic will scare the pyjamas off of even namma Superstar Rajnikanth! He can do anything in this world, except avoiding/weaving through our traffic. And it always so happens that i had to get caught in the busiest of days - Today.
Thankfully, my faithful beast - Yamaha R15 - never lets me down. I hang my bag on the two rearview mirrors so that it straddles my petrol tank (to avoid sweating you see), wear my helmet and the journey from my place (Saligramam) to my workplace (MRC Nagar) is a loong journey. I get to play road rash with my other late going office buddies, give evil stares to aunties standing in the middle of the road, try to act brave in front of the bus drivers, avert near certain death a couple of times and ofcourse, bask in the glorious Sunshine. Gives an awesome suntan you know. Try it out!
In the middle of all this, just 3 KM away from work, i get pulled over by namma traffic police. The usual scene - Sergeant with his humongous left thigh on his even bigger bike, seriously fiddling with something god knows what. The constables trying to catch every miserable sod on a two wheeler - ones not wearing helmets, overspeeding, riding with two pillion riders, and ofcourse the ones who obey traffic rules most of the time.
Maybe it was my bushy goatee or i dont know what exactly. The constable caught me reaching the signal and instantly jumped in the middle of the road and said -
"..Orama Va Pa Thambi!"
And so, confidently with the knowledge of and pride that i always carry my bike papers, i quickly slapped my license onto the waiting constable's outstretched palm alongwith my insurance papers. And he looked at me, pointed his finger to my bike's ass and said -
"Number plate fancy a poda kudathunu theriyadha pa??" (don't you know that wearing a fancy number plate is wrong?)
My mindvoice told me "F**K, i'm done for". Whatever precautions one may take, the smallest of details go unnoticed. I learnt that. Although i have immense respect for our Traffic Police and the responsibilities they undertake, i couldn't help but laugh at what was happening. Knowing that i was at fault, i voluntarily asked what the fine would be.
The Sergeant, with a smile said - "100 rupees kudunga sir, receipt bill tharen" Under the scorching heat, my already fried brain told me that i had forgotten to draw cash from the ATM. Sheepishly i told the officer that i had only 60 rupees in hand. And smack came the answer! "ATM pakathule iruku, poi draw pannitu vaanga sir!"
How lucky could i get? The nearest ATM was 2 KM away..and so i walked, jogged, drew cash and came back like a wet donkey. I signed the electronic receipt-churning machine and lo came the offence sheet. And what i saw shocked me!
I had been fined under two sections:
So what did i do upon seeing this? NOTHING. Why? Because its a waste of time.
So what sort of recklessness was that? I DON'T KNOW. Disobedience to orders? Me? I had practically handed out even my older insurance papers to these cops! Then why was i fined under that section?
What sort of disregardful behavior and brash violation was that? I will never know..! Worst part was i had even signed on the receipt unknowingly accepting a crime i never committed! Irony.
What i know is this...Just enacting a bill will not change anything. We are humans. Humans with emotions, thoughts and a very powerful gift of making our own decisions. Ultimately, a person who is inclined to cheat or take advantage of others, will stop at nothing.
Ink on paper doesn't sound very convincing when its actually an issue of changing the underlying moral values of us humans.
Given a chance to cheat, we will cheat.
Given a chance to fight, we will fight.
Given a chance to rob, we will rob.
After all, we humans place ourselves above anything else. These are the precious words coming out of the newly branded "Criminal"
So do i feel lucky punk? No.
Until next time, safe riding (and please do change your number plates, if its one of those 007 or BOSS type plates)
P.S - Subscribe to comments via email to follow up!
And so, confidently with the knowledge of and pride that i always carry my bike papers, i quickly slapped my license onto the waiting constable's outstretched palm alongwith my insurance papers. And he looked at me, pointed his finger to my bike's ass and said -
"Number plate fancy a poda kudathunu theriyadha pa??" (don't you know that wearing a fancy number plate is wrong?)
My mindvoice told me "F**K, i'm done for". Whatever precautions one may take, the smallest of details go unnoticed. I learnt that. Although i have immense respect for our Traffic Police and the responsibilities they undertake, i couldn't help but laugh at what was happening. Knowing that i was at fault, i voluntarily asked what the fine would be.
The Sergeant, with a smile said - "100 rupees kudunga sir, receipt bill tharen" Under the scorching heat, my already fried brain told me that i had forgotten to draw cash from the ATM. Sheepishly i told the officer that i had only 60 rupees in hand. And smack came the answer! "ATM pakathule iruku, poi draw pannitu vaanga sir!"
How lucky could i get? The nearest ATM was 2 KM away..and so i walked, jogged, drew cash and came back like a wet donkey. I signed the electronic receipt-churning machine and lo came the offence sheet. And what i saw shocked me!
I had been fined under two sections:
- Defective Number Plate - Sec 177 - Rs.50 (my fault, hence i can live with it)
- Disobedience to orders/abstraction/refusal to give information - Sec 179 - Rs.50 (What the hell!? when did i do that!?)
So what did i do upon seeing this? NOTHING. Why? Because its a waste of time.
So what sort of recklessness was that? I DON'T KNOW. Disobedience to orders? Me? I had practically handed out even my older insurance papers to these cops! Then why was i fined under that section?
What sort of disregardful behavior and brash violation was that? I will never know..! Worst part was i had even signed on the receipt unknowingly accepting a crime i never committed! Irony.
What i know is this...Just enacting a bill will not change anything. We are humans. Humans with emotions, thoughts and a very powerful gift of making our own decisions. Ultimately, a person who is inclined to cheat or take advantage of others, will stop at nothing.
Ink on paper doesn't sound very convincing when its actually an issue of changing the underlying moral values of us humans.
Given a chance to cheat, we will cheat.
Given a chance to fight, we will fight.
Given a chance to rob, we will rob.
After all, we humans place ourselves above anything else. These are the precious words coming out of the newly branded "Criminal"
So do i feel lucky punk? No.
Until next time, safe riding (and please do change your number plates, if its one of those 007 or BOSS type plates)
P.S - Subscribe to comments via email to follow up!
September 1, 2011
Ninja Fruitassin - Reloaded
PROLOGUE:
The Year is 2028 A.D. I am a Ninja of the Otaku Clan.
Man, known to be the most powerful and evolved organism in the world has achieved many great things. He has walked on Jupiter, visited the Andromeda galaxy, discovered time travel, achieved 100% cognitive capacity and has also gone beyond the 4th dimension.
He is now constantly facing a threat that was unforeseen and unpredicted. (Even by the Mayans)
The Year is 2028 A.D. I am a Ninja of the Otaku Clan.
Man, known to be the most powerful and evolved organism in the world has achieved many great things. He has walked on Jupiter, visited the Andromeda galaxy, discovered time travel, achieved 100% cognitive capacity and has also gone beyond the 4th dimension.
He is now constantly facing a threat that was unforeseen and unpredicted. (Even by the Mayans)
Invasion. Fruit Invasion.
We know not where they come from. But we do know who created them - The Diabolical Halfbrick Studios from the Queensland Solar System.
THE FRUIT INVASION:
It all began on April 21, 2010 A.D. The people of the world woke up to the squishes and splashes of fruits from the sky. Rocketing towards the Earth at the speed of light, Apples, Pineapples, Bananas, Peaches and humongous Water Melons came hurtling down upon the unsuspecting people of the Earth. As soon as the sweet juices of the fruits touched the skin of the humans, they transformed into fruits themselves! Millions of humans turned into fruits within hours...and then it stopped. It was foretold that such an event was to happen again in the not so distant future.
Man has got back on his feet and just when things seemed to be in control again, we were told of the larger doom awaiting us..in 2028. Right after the first attack we have constantly tried to find multiple ways to fend off another fruit invasion. We ninjas hate fruit.
THE DISCOVERY:
In 2022, One of our most covert Ninja (Sensei) discovered that slicing the fruits nullified and destroyed its evil effects. And thus began the quest to master the art of fruit killing. What happened next was something unbelievable, something miraculous.
We chanced upon a 2011 version of the IntelAppUp Center and alongwith it, an awesome simulation and training module - the Ultimate Secret to stop the Fruit Invasion.
Fruit Ninja HD Lite (Built by Halfbrick Studios themselves)
This app really did the trick - In one way it was jam packed with training features, any normal ninja could casually train with the module and most importantly, it gave us the edge to ward off the upcoming attack.
BECOMING A NINJA FRUITASSIN: (Rocky Style)
Several weeks passed, every ninja of the Otaku Clan trained with the simulation app and attained higher levels of ninja-ness. But i had gone beyond all of them - i had become a Ninja Fruitassin...
I did this by constantly cross training between the Zen Mode and the Arcade Mode.
The Zen Mode tripled my combo attack efficiency, thus ensuring i missed no evil fruit from my sights.
The Arcade Mode bestowed awesome power ups, gave the daftness to avoid the bombs and the ability to do a blitzkrieg in case i faced hundreds of fruits at the same time. All within a span of 60 seconds. It was a skill beyond comparison.
And so, as our clan prepare to make a last stand against the fruits - we only have this to say
That is the Way of the Ninja.
The Fruit Ninja HD Lite app has given us hope. given us courage. Most of all, it has given us the fruit ninja-ness that we possess today. We recommend it to you, you who is part of some clan in the world.
Save the World. Get the Fruit Ninja HD Lite app. Become the One. Become a Ninja Fruitassin.
As for me..a vicious pineapple is hurtling towards me..!! Wataaaaaaaeeeeeeee...Shathak!!! (Juice spraying)
This blog is an entry to the "My Favorite PC App" contest. Check out numerous apps for PC/Netbooks available at the Intel AppUp Center. If you are looking for an opportunity to build and monetize your applications, check out the Intel® Atom™ Developer Program.
THE FRUIT INVASION:
It all began on April 21, 2010 A.D. The people of the world woke up to the squishes and splashes of fruits from the sky. Rocketing towards the Earth at the speed of light, Apples, Pineapples, Bananas, Peaches and humongous Water Melons came hurtling down upon the unsuspecting people of the Earth. As soon as the sweet juices of the fruits touched the skin of the humans, they transformed into fruits themselves! Millions of humans turned into fruits within hours...and then it stopped. It was foretold that such an event was to happen again in the not so distant future.
Man has got back on his feet and just when things seemed to be in control again, we were told of the larger doom awaiting us..in 2028. Right after the first attack we have constantly tried to find multiple ways to fend off another fruit invasion. We ninjas hate fruit.
THE DISCOVERY:
In 2022, One of our most covert Ninja (Sensei) discovered that slicing the fruits nullified and destroyed its evil effects. And thus began the quest to master the art of fruit killing. What happened next was something unbelievable, something miraculous.
We chanced upon a 2011 version of the IntelAppUp Center and alongwith it, an awesome simulation and training module - the Ultimate Secret to stop the Fruit Invasion.
FRUIT NINJA HD LITE SPECS:
A thorough examination of the IntelAppUp Center revealed this:
After starting the simulation module, i am stunned to see the exact fruits that invaded our Earth hurled up on the screen. Anger. Rage. I slice my blade (air mouse) through the barrage of fruits.
A thorough examination of the IntelAppUp Center revealed this:
- A downloadable App Market bigger and better than any other.
- Developers can submit apps or app components to the AppUp Center.
- People can view and explore various app categories suited to their training module.
- Exact Simulation of the Fruit Invasion.
- Accurate reproduction of the Ninja Martial Arts and Samurai.
- Multiple levels that increases the difficulty, thus sharpening the skills of the Ninjas.
- Power Ups and Combo Attacks!
- Plethora of Weapons to choose from
- The ultimate satisfaction of spraying fruit juice all over the place!
- Most of all, it is Xbox Kinect enabled, which means we can simulate the exact slicing technique!
After starting the simulation module, i am stunned to see the exact fruits that invaded our Earth hurled up on the screen. Anger. Rage. I slice my blade (air mouse) through the barrage of fruits.
Shathak!! There went the apple ..sliced in half! Thawk went the watermelon, its inside spewing juice..it was a ugly sight. But as i licked my lips in satisfaction, i could not contain my hate for these fruits.
 |
| RAMPAGE! |
With each simulation being more difficult than the other, i had to make use of Combo Attacks (slice 4/5 fruits at once) to train better. With the fruit death count increasing, i was on a rampage. I could not be stopped. I needed more fruits to cut, more weapons and more ambient backgrounds to simulate the real thing.
Having started of with the normal blade, i had now advanced to the flame blade; each cut burning through the squishy fruits, sealing their doom.
Having started of with the normal blade, i had now advanced to the flame blade; each cut burning through the squishy fruits, sealing their doom.
BECOMING A NINJA FRUITASSIN: (Rocky Style)
Several weeks passed, every ninja of the Otaku Clan trained with the simulation app and attained higher levels of ninja-ness. But i had gone beyond all of them - i had become a Ninja Fruitassin...
I did this by constantly cross training between the Zen Mode and the Arcade Mode.
The Zen Mode tripled my combo attack efficiency, thus ensuring i missed no evil fruit from my sights.
The Arcade Mode bestowed awesome power ups, gave the daftness to avoid the bombs and the ability to do a blitzkrieg in case i faced hundreds of fruits at the same time. All within a span of 60 seconds. It was a skill beyond comparison.
And so, as our clan prepare to make a last stand against the fruits - we only have this to say
"If its fruit, slice it.
If its your doom, embrace it."
That is the Way of the Ninja.
The Fruit Ninja HD Lite app has given us hope. given us courage. Most of all, it has given us the fruit ninja-ness that we possess today. We recommend it to you, you who is part of some clan in the world.
Save the World. Get the Fruit Ninja HD Lite app. Become the One. Become a Ninja Fruitassin.
As for me..a vicious pineapple is hurtling towards me..!! Wataaaaaaaeeeeeeee...Shathak!!! (Juice spraying)
THE END
P.S - The above post was intended to describe the App with a Creative Twist.This blog is an entry to the "My Favorite PC App" contest. Check out numerous apps for PC/Netbooks available at the Intel AppUp Center. If you are looking for an opportunity to build and monetize your applications, check out the Intel® Atom™ Developer Program.
August 21, 2011
My Tryst with Mario!
Here i am..Rock you like a Hurricane..Here i am..Rock you like a..oh hi there!! I was just listening to one of the all time great rock anthems! ..You know the 80's is one of the greatest decades that mankind has seen and experienced! (including my birth in 1989!) It was the decade that ushered in a series of global events,iconic figures in music, politics, film and sport, and most of all - Technology. It was the age of computers, television, VHS, boomboxes and more relevantly - Video Gaming baby!!
Video Gaming took the world by storm and Japan seemed to be the one of the best in Video Game development! Nintendo, Capcom and Namco especially were churning out games that would be played over the next two decades ! Well of course in India, we had the misfortune of being exposed to these gadgets only almost 15 years after its release! I will never forget the day when i feasted my eyes on the legendary Fourth Generation Nintendo Gaming Console (16 bit version). It was a thing of beauty, but alas, i had to settle for a cheaper copy of the console after weeks of pleading my parents! (this was back in 1999-2000)
And ofcourse ROM cartridges were needed to play and being a first time gamer i was pretty confused about which games to buy as i had no clue about the popular games at that time! In Pondy Bazaar, T.Nagar, is every kid's gaming heaven - Maya's Plaza. At that time, games were sold not individually but as a package with a lot of other games in the same ROM cartridge. 64 in One, 3 in One, 256 in One ; these were some of the ROM cartridges available at that time! So i chose the 64 in One (paid around Rs.400) , checked to see if it worked or not at the shop, and i returned home as fast as i could for the official console unpacking ceremony.
After unpacking and figuring out the connections in my old BPL TV, i finally switched on the power, inserted the ROM Cartridge and i just stood there. What i saw on the screen is etched in my memory even today. The plethora of 8 bit characters on the main screen coupled with the mono electronic music was an absolute delight! The feel of the controller was so amazing that i pressed the arrow buttons a hundred times before settling down!
 |
| Good Ol' days of the Cartridges |
And then it happened. I discovered the greatest game of all time, Game no.2 on the screen; the game that would forever make me want for more! the game that every gamer should and must have played -
The Super Mario Bros. !!!!
On entering the game, i was welcomed by the screen shown above and what came next was the best part.
The Central Characters in the game are Mario & Luigi, Italian American plumbers living in the Mushroom Kingdom, the fearsome and evil Bowser - Mario's archnemesis and ofcourse the beautiful Princess Peach. The plot of the game is quite simple - Evil Bowser wants to takeover the Mushroom Kingdom and kidnaps Princess Peach. Mario & Luigi take it on themselves to save Princess Peach and Mushroom Kingdom. For this, they have to pass through eight worlds of the Mushroom Kingdom and defeat King Bowser at the eighth level!
The Central Characters in the game are Mario & Luigi, Italian American plumbers living in the Mushroom Kingdom, the fearsome and evil Bowser - Mario's archnemesis and ofcourse the beautiful Princess Peach. The plot of the game is quite simple - Evil Bowser wants to takeover the Mushroom Kingdom and kidnaps Princess Peach. Mario & Luigi take it on themselves to save Princess Peach and Mushroom Kingdom. For this, they have to pass through eight worlds of the Mushroom Kingdom and defeat King Bowser at the eighth level!
Pretty exciting right?? :)
As days passed by, i was drawn more and more into the world of Mario, fascinated by the awesome gameplay, by its atmospheric detailing, the legendary theme music ringing in my ears even when i slept! Millions of people over the world can never forget the transformation of Mario in Super Mario whenever he eats the "Super Mushroom", the " "Flower" that gives Mario the power to shoot fireballs or the many times when that "One up Mushroom" was needed when Mario's life was short!! Level One of Super Mario Bros. can be played over and over again especially with that music going in the background! (Play Below!!)
It used to be so much fun whenever i stomped on the turtles and made them turn over their shells and when i collected as many coins as i could in the bonus levels when Mario went down the green pipe! And oh! the tension when the timer ticks down to the last few seconds and you know you have to make Mario run faster to the finish point in each level! Was that fun or wat!?! I still remember the many times iv tried to reach the top of the flag pole at the end of each level by making Mario run as fast as possible and and jump over the last set of steps so that i could get the maximum points! .. and who could not want to break the thousands of bricks in the Mushroom Kingdom and particularly Mario doing a Superman Stance every time he jumps!
But as the old saying goes, all good things had to come to an end..my video console bombed 2 years later and i have never played Mario since then...
The truth is..Mario Bros. was not just a game. It was an essential part of my life, of everybody's lives. Mario made everyone happy and was the hero anybody wanted to be.!
There will definitely come a time, when i would tell my children and their children that once upon a time, there used to be a game called Mario. And how he changed my life forever. This was my tryst with the great Mario and soon it would be theirs.
Until next time...Cheerio!
P.S - Do let me know if you still have the old video game console with the Super Mario Bros. game :)
As days passed by, i was drawn more and more into the world of Mario, fascinated by the awesome gameplay, by its atmospheric detailing, the legendary theme music ringing in my ears even when i slept! Millions of people over the world can never forget the transformation of Mario in Super Mario whenever he eats the "Super Mushroom", the " "Flower" that gives Mario the power to shoot fireballs or the many times when that "One up Mushroom" was needed when Mario's life was short!! Level One of Super Mario Bros. can be played over and over again especially with that music going in the background! (Play Below!!)
It used to be so much fun whenever i stomped on the turtles and made them turn over their shells and when i collected as many coins as i could in the bonus levels when Mario went down the green pipe! And oh! the tension when the timer ticks down to the last few seconds and you know you have to make Mario run faster to the finish point in each level! Was that fun or wat!?! I still remember the many times iv tried to reach the top of the flag pole at the end of each level by making Mario run as fast as possible and and jump over the last set of steps so that i could get the maximum points! .. and who could not want to break the thousands of bricks in the Mushroom Kingdom and particularly Mario doing a Superman Stance every time he jumps!
 |
| Up Up and Away! |
| Mushroom Time! |
You so want to buy that old 8 bit video game console don't you? :) Back when i was in 9th grade, i remember playing in the Two Player Mode with my baby sister and every time i lost a life in the game, i would take a life from her (She played Luigi btw) ! And the fight after that was even more hilarious!.. (evil aren't i?)
In one way, Mario and his world changed me. It showed me a whole new universe that i did not know existed ever before..If i were to calculate the total hours of my life that i spent playing Mario, it would roughly work out to over 1300 hours!!! There are others who have clocked more than that :) You may think we are crazy, but we are not! Our sole aim was to save Princess Peach from the clutches of King Bowser! Period.
The truth is..Mario Bros. was not just a game. It was an essential part of my life, of everybody's lives. Mario made everyone happy and was the hero anybody wanted to be.!
There will definitely come a time, when i would tell my children and their children that once upon a time, there used to be a game called Mario. And how he changed my life forever. This was my tryst with the great Mario and soon it would be theirs.
Until next time...Cheerio!
P.S - Do let me know if you still have the old video game console with the Super Mario Bros. game :)
November 14, 2010
A Place to Be Naked
Before the Broca’s area of your brain makes you wander off to the land of i-can-streak-all-i-want…hold on I say!! I’m not talking about any place where you can actually get naked! But the funny thing is most of us have been to this place…this place to be naked is otherwise called as a Gymnasium! Ok so what’s the connection between getting naked and the bloody gym!? Well, if I were a Spartan (King Leonidas maybe?) in ancient Greece
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| Its a funny world! |
Cutting to the present, so I joined a fancy gym located in one of the posh locales of namma Chennai, with the aspiration of gaining a physique which would at least be half as awesome as what Gerard Butler had in the jaw dropping movie, 300. This being my 3rd gym, I should say i was quite excited due to the fact that the gym is said to be one of the best in Chennai, with dedicated trainers, loads of fitness equipment, huge training floors and most importantly, a lot of eye candy for the visually starved ;)
And so began, my 3rd attempt to sleep early, wake up early, hit the gym, go for work, spend time with friends, come back home, study and once again sleep early! To me this is a vicious cycle, screw up one, you screw them all! And on a fresh Monday morning, I entered the gym and informed the receptionist that today was my first day. The receptionist with her Colgate smile picked up the phone and called one of the trainers to assist me in the workout. The trainer, even though weary-eyed took me through the basics of the treadmill, the cross trainer, rowing etc.
Three weeks have passed by, and during one of the 20 minute treadmill thumping exercise, I observed. Now what is so new about that? We all observe our surroundings right? But the strange thing with me is, I like to see the way people carry themselves in a public place like the gymnasium. Like I said before we all have been to the gym at some point in our lives, and we can’t deny the fact that human beings are complex creatures! They come with different personalities, different attitudes and even in different shapes!!
However varied we might be, we do have some common patterns, we belong to a specific type and you, you who are reading this post know it as well. It is with this thought I made some very close observations. Observations of the place to be naked!
Say you are working out in the gym right now. Just pause the pumping music of your iPod, put down the barbells your holding and look around. What do you see? For the gym-hopper (like me) this would be a common but strange sight.
Turn your gaze to the cardio section; you would see a 40 year old uncle, bespectacled, balding and with a decent patch of hair around the head, dressed in a huge tee-shirt, with his chubby cheeks and copious stomach, struggling and sweating to keep pace with the speed of the treadmill, huffing and gasping for breath, with the dream that one day he can fit into his old 32 sized pants once again. Poor sod. Let him be.
Now look to the EFX cross trainer section; you would see a woman in her late fifties, with heavy duty make up, clad in a salwar, with gold bangles and necklace, slightly on the heavier side, lazily working out, watching the television. Now these women have never been to a gym in their lives before and hence the shyness to wear proper gym clothing! About the gold ornaments, I really don’t know!
Now comes the juicy part, err…I mean interesting part! Divert your attention to the corner of the gym; you would have definitely seen her! Yes, the bong bombshell, the bipasha look-alike, the one person who makes the rest of the men increase the speed on the treadmill and put on a few extra kilos on the bench press! She would most probably be dressed in a clinging outfit, straightened hair and with a seductive gait. Basically she is every man’s dream. God bless her because she makes it a worthwhile effort to visit the gym.
And there is always the trainer. Always. With his big hunky muscles and a flirtatious smile slapped across his face, short to medium haircut, he would always help the damsels in distress. The damsel in distress in this case is Ms.Bombshell. Both of them actually hit it off quite well. The workout sessions are a sight to watch… But alas! new bees like me are ignored, like as though we had joined the gym for free! And one other thing about trainers is their love to prescribe supplements to the men pumping iron. I’m sure many of you have been asked this question.
“Supplements saapdunga saar! Appo dhan pa udambu weight potu muscle laam valarum"
Well. That’s the trainer for you!!
The next person you will come across is the man-behind-the-butt! Yes, this is your typical pervert, always behind a woman’s behind, always looking for a chance to ogle and drool. This guy nicknamed The Ass Man does not come to the gym to workout. His objectives are clear and simple. Ass. Ass. And only Ass! As soon as he spots his prey, his eyes pop out, his heart rate quadruples, his mind starts thinking of a way to ogle but not get caught. This guy could be anybody. But most of the times, it’s either a man in his early twenties or a middle aged man. So all you women out there…beware!
Now just turn around and watch the weights section. Do you see that Arnold Schwarzenegger look alike? He is the beef cake of the gym, muscles so huge that even my thigh looks small compared it. Pumped with protein supplements he does not care about the people around him. As he adds 110 lbs on the bicep curl, the entire gym watches in awe as his biceps pop out, the nerves ready to burst, his eyes with fury, the sweat from his brows grazing the ground, and as the repetitions increase, one wonders if he is human at all! Unmatched and unrivalled, his body is every weightlifter’s dream.
And on the aerobics floor, it is possible to see a couple working out together. These two canaries are so into each other, that they are oblivious of their surroundings. All the guy cares about is the girl and all the girl cares about is the guy. The guy would be tall and lanky while the girl would be of medium stature, sweet looking with a pretty smile…Ok now leave those two lovebirds and move on.
These people are hard to miss. Trust me you have seen and been annoyed by them. They are the megaphones of the gym, the cellulite aunty in her late sixties, the skinny lady in her late forties and the uncles in his late fifties. They come fully dressed up in every brand present in the market, yapping away to glory about how they bought a new sari for Rs.20000 or some latest gossip about their relatives. With their loud guffaws and shrieks of laughter you just wish they would go away!
Well…I’ve sort of made you see the complexities and differences of the people around us. We can easily relate ourselves to one of the specimens mentioned above. That’s the beauty of it. But…there is always a big but (no pun intended) by the end of this long post, you must be wondering –
The writer of this post never mentioned anything about himself??
Well…me… I’m the skinny guy at some lone corner of the gym trying extremely hard, with all my effort to do some simple push ups! And where do I fit in here? I’m the observer, I just see what people do and rant about it to readers like you! That’s pretty much it :) and what am I going to do now? It’s back to the push ups for me!
1…groan…2….grunt...gnnnn... …3….arghh…4…until then! Cheerio!
Special Thanks to Sandhya Prabhat for agreeing to be the guest cartoonist for this post despite her busy schedule and also being able to deliver in such a short span of time. Many thanks to her for bringing alive what I had portrayed in my mind. That according to me is the characteristic of a true artist. Both of us hope that this post has been as much fun as it was, for her when she made the cartoon and for me when I wrote the post. Please do leave a comment below if you liked it!
About Sandhya-
Sandhya Prabhat is from Chennai, India. She is a freelance illustrator and animator, currently pursuing her final year MFA in Animation and Digital Arts in NYU Tisch Asia School Singapore Stella Maris College
No, she does not have a blog yet but hopes to have one soon.
She can be reached at sandhya.22@gmail.com
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